“What’s your 2012 resolution, Leslie?” my friend Karine asked.
“It’s clear. Not to take people’s crap,” I responded.
“Oh yah?” she replied with a surprised laugh, “I got the impression that you already do that.”
“Yes, it’s true, you are very direct,” my friend Christophe chimed in.
“Yes, well even more so this year I suppose,” I laughed.
If there is one thing I need to make clear for my readers this year, it’s that you don’t have to waste your time and energy on the wrong people and their “crap”. Their words and actions are not a reflection of you, they’re a reflection of them and how they feel on the inside. It’s not YOUR truth and you don’t have to be sucked in, involved, and emotionally wrecked because of the garbage people spew out and choose to live in.
Here are my five reasons why you should stop hanging out with the wrong people:
1. LIFE IS SHORT
First of all, life is so short and so precious that spending it with people that have bad habits, negative perceptions, and horrible attitudes will only suck the joy out of our lives. We get so caught up in their negativity that we’re wasting our thoughts and words on things that won’t help US improve our lives and our relationships.
Who in your life gives you positive energy and inspiration? Who distracts you with negative energy?
2. FOCUS ON PEOPLE WHO ALREADY LOVE YOU
It’s not worth it to fight for someone’s attention when they don’t make you a priority and don’t appreciate your true value. In the business world, companies spend more time and resources wooing the customers who already love them, rather than trying to gain the attention of people who don’t already see their value. Spend time with people who love you for who your are and can see the value you bring into their lives.
I’m pretty sure you have people in your life who are already crazy about you and want to be with you and see you lead a happy, healthy life. Who are these people? Can you list them?
3. CHANGE FOR YOURSELF
It’s not beneficial to change who you are for someone else when you’re not ready or have no desire to make a change. Without even noticing, we’re allowing the wrong people influence us in such a way as to change our thoughts and attitudes. This type of brainwashing and manipulation only leads to a broken spirit and low self esteem. Remember that true change comes from within and that change is a reflection of where we are in our hearts and minds – you and you alone should be the judge of your emotional and spiritual development. Change for the better, not for the worst.
Who brings the worst out of you? Who brings the best out of you?
4. BE EMOTIONALLY FREE
Don’t allow the wrong people in your life control your emotions. There are some people out there in the world who purposely try to manipulate your emotions by creating drama, saying or doing hurtful things, or make you feel bad about who you are. These people are hurting inside and they want you to feel their pain and even worse, try to purposely break your spirit. You don’t have to live in perpetual fear.
You don’t have to allow their behavior to kill your joy. You can keep these people at a distance and set clear boundaries so they don’t have the access to hurt you and if they try, know that you can reject their attempts and let it go because you know what they’re saying is not the truth. Offenses can and usually will be made, but they can only hurt us if they are accepted – don’t accept them.
Who in your life manipulates your feelings and sentiments? How can you set clear boundaries? What is the truth you live for?
4. BE THE EXAMPLE
And last of all, when you’re living to make the best version of yourself so that you can spread joy and love, you’re less inclined to take people’s negative words and actions to heart. When you’re focused on helping yourself and others do better, you’re going to be fearless in being direct and constructive about their behavior thereby acting as an example for spiritually healthy and happy living. When you help yourself do better, you’re inspiring and teaching others by your example.
Who in your life is an example of joy? How can you help others through your actions?